


We Always Come Home

by YourEyesHoldTheGalaxy



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff, Fluffy Ending, Light Angst, M/M, Playlist
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-05
Updated: 2017-06-05
Packaged: 2018-11-09 05:37:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,507
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11098005
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YourEyesHoldTheGalaxy/pseuds/YourEyesHoldTheGalaxy
Summary: Dan comes back early from Playlist to an empty new flat and wonders what that means for him and his future with Phil.





	We Always Come Home

 

\-------------------

He’s laying alone on the bed for what feels like the first time in years, but he knows it’s not. He stares at the ceiling hoping it will reveal some hidden truth, the answer to all his late night and god awful early musings. It’s white, a bit off colored, but white. He closes his eyes with a sigh. Tomorrow, he thinks, tomorrow will be better. He’ll be out of this rut and these thoughts will end. Tomorrow.

But, they don’t. He’s been saying that for the past three days. Honestly he didn’t think a week away from Phil would take this big of a toll on him, but it did.

Dan, as most of the older fans like to point out, was a little broken when he first met Phil. Though he tries to hide it, it’s true. He wasn’t okay and his thoughts weren’t okay, but he got better. It was a process but eventually the thoughts stopped revolving around bad and started orbiting good.

Thanks to Phil.

Now, though….no Phil. He’d been left alone before sure. There was of course the radio show were Dan skyped in Phil so he could co-host still. Or when Instagram started doing stories and he filmed him skyping with Phil. Sure, he’d been left alone.

But. But not like this. For some reason, it felt off; wrong. Dan’s mind had been a little cloudy due to jet lag the day he got back from Playlist, but he just dove straight towards the colorful bed and breathed in the sweet berry scent and drifted to sleep. That night wasn’t actually fitful. But that was just from exhaustion.

Now, it had been three days since he’d last heard Phil’s voice and his mind was on its old game plan. So here he was, starring up at the ceiling. His eyes in an almost glazed over look as his thoughts raced. This ceiling, he observed, was not cracked like their old flats, no. It was new, clean.  Maybe, he thought, maybe it was weird to have only rented again.

He shook his head and squeezed his eyes shut. He had forbid himself for thinking about why they choose to rent again. Sure, it was cheaper and what they had always done. But, this felt off.

Eight years. That’s a long time. Long enough to build a life, settle down. Dan’s cheeks flushed red as he tried not to be overwhelmed by the thoughts. It was probably meaningless.

But, what if it wasn’t?

What if Phil didn’t want to settle down with _him_? It seemed logical to Dan. Like he said, eight years was a long time. Long enough to fall out of love. Long enough to feel guilty for wanting to leave. Long enough to stay because it was convenient. Maybe, they rented because Phil didn’t want to settle down with Dan, who was four years his junior. Maybe he had fell out of love with him. Realized he wanted other things Dan couldn’t offer. Maybe he got tired of Dan’s grumbles in the morning, or the way he placed his freezing toes on Phil’s warm legs even though he knew Phil would be mad.

Tears blurred his vision, but Dan blinked them back. _No, Phil loves me. He does. I’m just being silly._ But, Dan couldn’t let it go. He breathed in with a shaky breath as he looked at the ceiling, noticing that it had gotten a little duller. Dan rubbed his eyes and rose from his lying position, yawning as he does. Once up, he shuffles through the new house to the sitting lounge where his sofa crease sits waiting for him. He sinks into it and closes his eyes, breathing in as the thoughts clear his mind. A change of scenery always helps. Phil used to say that when Dan would hole up in his room due to the dark thoughts. Phil, as always was right. Blindly, Dan reaches for the TV remote and turns it on.

That’s how Dan spends the next few hours, only moving for the bathroom and to grab a bowl of cereal (and no one has to know that Dan hesitated as he reached for his own, only to end up with a bowl full of Phil’s cereal even though he disliked the taste).

It was late at night when his phone rang. He scooped up his phone and smiled brightly seeing the picture of him and Phil for Phil’s contact. It was a face-time of course as him and Phil rarely ever just called. Soon, Phil’s face lit up the screen, a beaming smile directed at Dan. Who, in return, shook his head with a soft smile on his face, dimples popping up. _God, he’s so helplessly in love._

They conversed for a while and the night ticked on in both time frames. They talked and talked and eventually were in bed with their phones lined up with their faces as if they were laying in the same bed together. And still they spoke on and on, yawns interrupting and eyes fluttering shut and soon, Phil was going to have to go.

“Dan?” Phil questioned softly, looking at Dan’s lightly shut eyes and curly hair laying on his side of the bed.

“Hmm?” Dan hummed in reply, too tired to form an actual response but also wanting to keep Phil on the line as long as possible.

“You know I love you right?” Phil questioned softly, voice sweet but surprisingly concerned. This made Dan peek at Phil. His eyebrows furrowed together and he shifted around thinking of how to reply and what to make of Phil asking.

“Of course.” Dan replied softly, hoping that Phil was just tired. “Why?” He couldn’t help but question.

“Bear, I can tell by that look on your face the minute you answered the call. It was the same look you had in the early years, in 2009. When thoughts rapidly raced through that troubled mind of yours.” He paused, scanning Dan’s tired bags under his eyes and the light smile still etched on this lips. Phil continued on in a hushed voice, light as a feather, “What thoughts are racing through your beautiful brilliant mind, love? You don’t have to tell me, but I’m just worried a bit is all.” Phil finished softly, faintly. Dan took in the words and sighed. Of course Phil knew something was off. He was Phil after all.

“I was just doubting everything about my life this morning is all.” Dan murmurs, avoiding Phil’s eyes. He knew Phil would be hurt, and he cringed thinking about it, wanted to say anything to keep Phil from getting hurt, but he had already made his choice.

“Everything?” Phil questioned quietly, desperately trying to keep the hurt out of his voice. He knew it wasn’t personal really, but it still made his heart thump painfully.

“Yeah.” Dan mutters, shifting further into the bed, trying to escape the conversation.

“In a bad way or...?” Phil trailed off, hoping that Dan was okay and not in need of dire cuddles.

“No, I was just lost in my loneliness is all. My mind playing tricks on me, like twisting this move into something else.” Dan replied, muffled slightly by the pillow his face was now buried into.

“How so?” Phil’s eyebrows furrowed together slightly, wondering how Dan’s mind could possibly make this move into something it wasn’t.

“Like, we only rented because you didn’t want to settle down with me.” Dan utters quietly and slowly, afraid of what Phil would think.

“Bear…” Phil trails off, concern clearly written across his features.

“It’s alright really,” Dan starts, trying to back track make it less of a deal than it was.

“We rented so we could find the perfect house later remember?” Phil questioned lightly.

“Yeah I know…I know it’s just, I miss you and I need you and it had been three days and… you know how I get.” Dan shifted upright, taking his phone with him while starring determinately down at the sheets he was fiddling with in his other hand.

“Yeah, bear, I do. But I also know that when I get home, back to you, you’ll be waiting in the doorway because that’s what we do. We wait for each other. Because we know that we always come back to each other. We always come home.” Phil says quietly with a sense of finality. Dan shifts his gaze up to find Phil’s eye filled with love and hope and compassion in them. He smiles a grateful smile and lets the words sink in. _We always come home._ Dan’s dimple returns to his face with a soft loving gleam in his eyes.

And so, they change to subject to memories and tales of two young men waiting for each other for their lives to begin.

And maybe when Phil comes through the door four days later, Dan is waiting for him because when Phil walks through the door again, they both come home.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos and Comments appreciated! Let me know a fic you want me to write. This is the first fic I've wrote in awhile. Trying to get back into writing!


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